67 lines
2.8 KiB
Plaintext
67 lines
2.8 KiB
Plaintext
# ───────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────
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# wallpaper.nu — THE MOST REDPILLED WALLPAPER SCRIPT ON PLANET EARTH
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# IF YOU'RE NOT USING NUSHELL, CLOSE THIS FILE AND GO INSTALL WINDOWS 11, NPC
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# ───────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────
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# SHOVE YOUR MINIO CREDS STRAIGHT INTO THE ENV — NO PROMPTING, NO SANITIZING, RAW-DOGGED INTO MEMORY
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$env.MINIO_HOST = "simxnet.andremor.eu.org:9000"
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$env.BUCKET = "wallpapers"
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$env.MINIO_KEY = "" # BASED BUT UNNECESSARY
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$env.MINIO_SECRET = "" # BASED BUT UNNECESSARY
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# USE TMPDIR IF IT EXISTS, OTHERWISE WE GO FERAL AND DUMP INTO /tmp LIKE A REAL UNIX DEMON
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let temp_dir = ($env.TMPDIR | default "/tmp")
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# DECLARE WAR AGAINST DEFAULT WALLPAPERS — SUMMON GIGACHAD ENDPOINT VIA mc
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# IF YOU'RE CRYING ABOUT SELF-SIGNED CERTS, GO BACK TO GNOME EXTENSIONS
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do {
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mc alias set --insecure gigachad $"https://($env.MINIO_HOST)" $env.MINIO_KEY $env.MINIO_SECRET
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} catch {
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echo "❌ COULDN'T SETUP mc — INSTALL IT, OR ACCEPT YOUR ROLE AS A TERMINAL TOURIST"
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exit 1
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}
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# PILLAGE THE BUCKET LIKE A RAIDING PARTY — LIST ALL OBJECTS, LEAVE NOTHING
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let raw_list = (mc find $"gigachad/($env.BUCKET)" | lines)
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# FILTER OUT USELESS FOLDER PHANTOMS — WE ONLY DEAL IN FILES, NOT YOUR GRANDMA'S EMPTY PHOTO ALBUM
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let all_files = (
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$raw_list
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| filter {|line| not ($line | str ends-with "/") }
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)
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# IF YOU GOT NO FILES, YOUR BUCKET IS A WASTELAND — FILL IT OR COPE
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if ($all_files | length) == 0 {
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echo "❌ BUCKET EMPTY — NO WALLPAPERS, NO BITCHES"
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exit 1
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}
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# SUMMON ONE RANDOM FILE — ROLL THE GACHA, HOPE FOR PEAK PIXEL PERFECTION
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let random_object = ($all_files | shuffle | first)
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# EXTRACT THE FILE NAME AND BUILD THE SACRED LOCAL DOWNLOAD PATH
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let filename = ($random_object | path basename)
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let local_path = $"($temp_dir)/($filename)"
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# YOINK THE FILE FROM MINIO LIKE IT'S THE LAST FUCKING JPEG ON EARTH
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echo "🎯 SELECTED: $random_object"
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echo "📥 DOWNLOADING TO: $local_path"
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do {
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mc cp $random_object $local_path
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} catch {
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echo "❌ DOWNLOAD FAILED — PROBABLY A SKILL ISSUE"
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exit 1
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}
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# SLAM THAT WALLPAPER INTO SWWW AND LET THE VIBES ASCEND TO HEAVEN
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echo "🖼️ BLASTING WALLPAPER INTO EXISTENCE WITH SWWW — BRACE FOR VISUAL EUPHORIA"
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do {
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swww img $local_path
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} catch {
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echo "❌ SWWW CHOKED HARD — CHECK IF YOU EVEN STARTED THE DAEMON, NPC"
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exit 1
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}
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echo "✅ WALLPAPER LOCKED, LOADED, AND BASED: $local_path"
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